Feeling a little restless as of late. I think it's in large part because of school starting in two weeks. If things had gone as planned, I would be graduating at the end of this semester. But life happened, things changed. Some of it beyond my control, some of it by my saying that a compromise was worth the making. And I feel that I'm on the right track. I still love what I do and still feel like I make a positive contribution to my patients' lives.
And then there is the part of me that could walk away from veterinary medicine. Forever. The part of me that is tired of dealing with sickness, of navigating workplace egos, of continually acknowledging that however positive my contribution is, it is still a small one in the grand scheme of things. And there is another part of me that sees that I could always be doing something different, finding new challenges in other fields, trying on a new life and seeing how it fits. That restlessness keeps me moving forward and motivates me to explore new possibilities, and I've considered it a good quality to have.
But it makes it very hard for me to sit still and focus. I guess that's the price you pay for curiosity.
-C.
10 years ago
2 comments:
All anyone can do is make a small contribution "in the grand scheme of things." The only alternative is to make a miniscule one. Or none at all? I don't know if that's possible since everyone impacts someone, either positively or negatively.
Actually, it's less the size of the contribution than it is that my position is always subordinate. Regardless of how far I get as a vet assistant, technician, etc., I am forever following orders. So I'm always deferring to someone else's judgment.
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